15.01-Oops, I farted

We are once again on the Smole! This season marks our 15^th season, and to celebrate that, we’ve invited the finalists of previous seasons to come and play a second round to prove their worth and justify their standings. They’ve all made it to the end, but this will prove to everyone who’s the best of the best, the cream of the crop. They all know the rules, but do you?

As with every season, we have contestants playing for money. The amount of money they win will be earned via missions, which will go into the Pot. There is also one Mole, who will earn whatever the winner did not earn. The other contestants are to find out who the Mole is and try to prevent him from sabotaging, if they wish. They have to take Mole quizzes and the lowest scorer each round will be executed.

This season promises a new way to earn more money. For every time the Mole is chosen as a suspect on the quiz, 10 points will be deducted from the Mole to go to the winner at the end of it all. Now, shall we welcome them back?

***

   

                                                                     

Victor: “Mmm, the food on the plane was nice.”

Ella: “What is this wretched place?”

Dominica: “Okay, here goes this again….”

Heather: “Am I late?”

“You’re just in time! Now, we may all enter!”

For the first time ever, Hossan is walking!

Taylor: “Ermahgerd, it’s Katerlyn! I abserlutely adore you!”

Katelyn: “WOO! A fan! A very young one in fact.”

Heather: “Stop that. I can read your thoughts and it’s blocking my face.”

“You may all know each other, but now is the time for proper introduction personally.”

Dominica: “Hi everyone! I’m Dominica Kaliton of Season 12. I won my season and I don’t mean to brag but I completely nailed it from the very start. But it may be based on luck. Here’s to proving that I have skill too!”

Victor: “My name is Victor. I love research. You all know who I am and my particulars, so I shan’t delve into them. I was the first ever winner and I’m glad to be back to win this a second time.”

Hossan: “I’m Hossan Ghoti from Season 9, I’m a ghost, yadda yadda, cut to the chase, I’m here to win. I’m indignant about losing to an old fogey the other time so now that he’s gone I’m going to kick all your butts! I don’t care about old people! I’ll do whatever it takes to save my face and win!”

Ella: “You insolent mortal!”

Hossan: “News flash. I’m not a mortal.”

Ella: “Shut up. It’s my turn. Everyone should know who I am. I am the greatest, Queen Ella Marie Tremble. I won the previous season and I shall be here to win this again. If you remember, anyone who tried to go against me ended up being executed, so if you want to stay and play a little while longer, stay on my good side.”

Taylor: “Okay, I’m Taylor Bleu. I’m still in my teens. I’m super stoked about coming back here and to a city like Bridgeport! This country girl wants to see it all! Recently I’ve picked up singing. Tay supports me fully. Perhaps this money can be used for  funding my future career and marriage? Oops. I mean…I’m from Season 7. Lucky 7.”

Katelyn: “Whaddup, dogs! I’m Katelyn Missoni, Season 4, big time celebrity! As famous as Matthew Hamming! Now I’m not playing for charity, so all the money I win goes to me! I’ve revised my success formula slightly, so I shall win this for sure! And I’m so over Esmeralda Ivy.”

Kay: “Hellooo everyone! I am Kay Micheals of Season 8. I won my season. Business has been fairly stagnant so I decided to join to have fun and get more money to invest in my fashion boutique business. I have a strong motive so I shall win.”

 

Heather: “And I’m forgotten, how? Anyway, I’m sure all of you remember me, Heather Long, winner of Season 12. I admit I appeared like a jerk and a user, a petty backstabber. I’m hoping I can change that view this time. I’ll try to be nice to everyone but be forewarned I’ll still do what I have to do to win.”

“Now that we’re done with introductions, let’s start with the first mission. You will be playing charades, where each person goes up one by one to act out a certain action or expression while the others guess. For every correct guess within the time limit of 30 seconds, 20 points are added. This is worth 160 points. An exemption is given to the one with the most correct guesses. Heather, you’re up first. Please enter the diary room to get your word or phrase.”

Victor: “We’re the only two guys here…want to form a coalition?”

Hossan: “Hmm…I see no harm in it.”

Heather: “I’m right behind you guys. I can hear whatever you’re saying.”

Victor: “Oh, we’re just saying…erm…you look gorgeous today!”

Hossan: “Yes! Exactly! She looks like a pig Victor, why the hell did you say that?”

Victor: “I didn’t know what to say!”

***

“This is a feeling. You have 30 seconds.”

Hossan: “Bored?”

Victor: “Relaxed?”

Hossan: “Whut.”

Heather: “Neither!”

Dominica: “Hmm…she’s pouting…upset?”

Taylor: “Vain?”

Heather: “Really? How can you see that? Wrong!”

Ella: “I’m not going to bother because your acting skills are pathetic.”

Katelyn: “Umm….”

“10 seconds left!”

Katelyn: “AAH! I don’t know! Like, do something better!”

Kay: “Angry?”

Heather: “Time’s up! Do we have the answer?”

.

.

.

.

.

Heather: “Well, this lady survived the cowplant, so Kay, you are right! 20 points!”

“Katelyn, you are next.”

***

Katelyn: “This is a trait. 30 seconds!”

Heather: “It looks like…strength?”

Kay: “That’s not a trait.”

Dominica: “Oh! Vain!”

Katelyn: “Nope! I don’t even know what that is!”

Hossan: “Can I guess stupid?”

Ella: “I would agree. Imbecility.”

Kay: “Don’t spout nonsense guys. I would say neat.”

Katelyn: “Time is up! The lady faces the cowplant….and she survives! Good job Kay!”

“Victor, you are next.”

***

Victor: “A body problem. 30 seconds starts now!”

Taylor: “Hmm…joint pain?”

Victor: “Not what I’m looking for!”

Ella: “I honestly couldn’t be bothered. You look stupid and wrong.”

Hossan: “Shush old hag. I’m trying to concentrate!”

Katelyn: “Oops, I farted.”

Ella: “How dare you!”

Hossan: “How dare I what?”

Ella: “Apologise! Now! Get on your knees!”

Hossan: “I’ll just sink through the floor. TOO BAD.”

Ella: “YOU!”

Victor: “Time’s up. The lady got swallowed whole. Ouch. No points earned here. Thanks for bickering. The correct answer was ‘knee pain’.”

“Hossan, you are next.”

***

Hossan: “It’s a person’s name. 30 seconds.”

Ella: “Really? You look like you couldn’t be bothered.”

Taylor: “Taylor Swift!”

Dominica: “….and how?”

Hossan: “No you idiot!”

Victor: “This is hard.”

Katelyn: “I don’t know who this could be?”

Kay: “Hossan Ghoti?”

Hossan: “You are an idiot. 10 seconds left.”

Heather: “Um…um…”

 

Hossan: “Time’s up! She’s dead. Boo-hoo. Can’t wait to see her ghost. It was ‘Eugene Sassy’. I was acting Sassy.”

“Kay, it is your turn.”

***

Kay: “Mine should be easy. It’s an action. Your time starts now.”

Victor: “I’m bad at this.”

Katelyn: “Oh, erm, plucking your moustache!”

Kay: “No. I’m a lady if you can’t see.”

Dominica: “Thinking! That must be it!”

Kay: “Still not it!”

Taylor: “Putting on makeup?”

Ella: “I’m trying to be nice and smile at you dear.”

Taylor: “You’re just being creepy.”

 

Kay: “Without me you guys are useless. The correct answer was brooding. Sorry Dominica, not close enough.”

“Dominica, your turn.”

***

“Mine is an object. 30 seconds!”

Victor: “A ball!”

Katelyn: “No, it must be a new dress! She’s feeling it, the soft silkiness…”

Dominica: “Nope.”

Katelyn: “Drats!”

Kay: “Well…a balloon? It seems round.”

Taylor: “How about a person’s face?”

Ella: “Disgusting, that’s what it is. Please stop disgracing yourself.”

Hossan: “Is it a crystal ball? I’m quite good at deciphering these supernatural things.”

Dominica: “We’ve got an answer! Just in time too!”

“Ella Marie, you are up.”

***

Ella: “It is a personality. You have half a minute.”

Kay: “Coquettish?”

Taylor: “Neat?”

Ella: “No.”

Heather: “Heartbroken?”

Hossan: “That’s no personality.”

Ella: “NO! I swear, if you guys continue getting this wrong, I will…”

Katelyn: “Lonely?”

Victor: “Shy?”

Ella: “Let’s see her fate…ooh, she makes it! Good job, Victor.”

“Taylor, you are the last.”

***

Taylor: “Last of the day! It’s an occupation! Your last 30 seconds!”

Heather: “Let’s analyse this. She’s doing jumping jacks…”

Dominica: “Now she’s doing the wave.”

Ella: “A swimmer?”

Taylor: “Not it.”

Kay: “An athlete?”

Taylor: “Getting colder.”

Katelyn: “Swim coach?”

Victor: “Guinea pig?”

Katelyn: “Isn’t that an insect?”

Victor: “It’s an animal, but in this case I mean a test subject. You know, like stunt tests?”

Taylor: “This lady says…good job to Katelyn! It is indeed a swim coach! 5 were guessed correctly, so 100/160 points were earned.  For guessing the most correctly, Kay earns herself an exemption.”

Heather: “I have so much to say about that mission. Firstly, the non-contributors were obviously Katelyn, Hossan and Ella Marie. Hossan and Ella Marie even bickered causing nobody to be able to guess! Kay started off well but dropped soon after. Taylor and Dominica weren’t the most helpful either. And most of them were ambiguous in their actions! Are all of them really winners?”